I’m sitting at the airport, waiting to head home and I’ve seen (and yes, I counted) seven pairs of Ugg boots already. Sigh. They’re truly hideous, I just have to say… and to everyone who wears them and reads this, I’m not judging. 😛

I checked two bags, and one, sadly, was 12 pounds over. The nice older man at the check-in counter said, “Well, you could take 12 pounds out of this bag and put it in that one.”

I smiled, “Not gonna happen.”

He started laughing, “Not gonna happen, hmm? Alright, 25 clams.”

I happily paid the man (seriously, aside from the whole “how the hell do I know when I’ve taken out 12 pounds?” fiasco, I’m not opening two suitcases in the middle of the airport and moving stuff around… hell no). All the while, he kept repeating “not gonna happen” and laughing. He thought I was adorable, lol.

So after I paid him and went to grab the bag, he said, “No, no, I’ll walk you over. It’s heavy.” And I just looked at him and laughed

He walked me to the security line and was still repeating “not gonna happen” and laughing. 🙂

Am I the only one who ever smiles/talks to the security screeners? I mean they’re doing their job and all they ever get is shit, especially from people who a) set off the alarms, b) or have kids or c) are business travelers who feel entitled. Now, I’m not bashing any or all of these groups, I’m just saying that when I notice people causing a ruckus, they normally fall into one of those categories.

I had my coffee, I slept well and it’s not bloody early in the morning, so I’m in a congenial mood. The baggage guy had made me laugh, so I was smiling when I got up to be screened. The older gentleman who took my boarding pass and reminded me to put everything in the tray smiled at me, so I smiled back and said “Good morning.” He responded with, “Well good morning insider, and how are you today?”

I grinned, “Just dandy, and you?”

He chuckled, “Well, I’m in charge here, so I’m great. At least I think I’m in charge…” and he started laughing. “According to my wife, I’m never in charge.” Then he wiggled his eyebrows at me and I was really laughing.

The guy who waved me through the security gate told me to stop flirting, otherwise he’d (and he pointed), get a big head.

“And you’re good, no alarms,” he finished with.

I smiled and said, “Of course not, I took off all the shiny stuff.”

(Now, if you’ve never heard a man in his sixties say “bling-bling,” you haven’t lived.)

“Ah that’s right, you got rid of all the bling-bling, hmm.”

Dying people, I was dying.

It’s going to be fun few weeks; I can already tell. 🙂

I have no words.

I need this.

And wendy can use it to beat the stealer-who-we-shall-not-name.

🙂

I don’t even know if I have a response to this: Coca-Cola Blak.

Why can’t it just be Black? I mean come on now.

We are still here—no NYC for us. 🙁 The coworker was cranky, so we went to her favorite place for lunch… the bar.

Yep.

So we went for a drink, ended up having two apiece and not paying for either… because we got an earful from a retired businessman who heard us talking and had to interject (and buy us drinks).

For two hours.

Oh. dear. god.

The bad thing about hotels is that the walls are awfully thin.

We woke up this morning to the sound of someone else’s shower. It was incredibly loud and honest-to-god the longest shower I have ever heard anyone take. It just kept going. Rolling over, I asked if we should call 911 and say someone had fallen or drowned. After about 30 minutes the water turned off, and satisfied, we went back to sleep.

An hour or so later I got up to take a shower. And there was no water. At all. I attempted to force it to come on, reasoning that I just needed to yank harder. He logically assumed that the hotel had turned it off, and suggested I call the front desk and lo and behold, the water was turned off. Due to the room next to us (of the extended shower) having an overflowed tub—in turns out that the water in that shower wouldn’t turn off, so finally the guy in there called the hotel and they shut down the water for some of the rooms… ours being one of them.

We’re now situated in another room and I’m busily trying to get some work done. He’s napping, lol. Apparently he hasn’t been getting enough sleep. So sad.

I am right now teaching my mom how to use eBay—via cellphone.

We are separated by 3000 miles, she has limited Internet knowledge anyway and she’s never even seen eBay before.

Oh. dear. god.

I’ve already started with the vodka.

Greatest Internet Moments (so far), by some random guy.

It’s historical and hilarious at the same time.

I woke up this morning with a brilliant plan… to shop at Target, then compare the prices with what I have purchased before at Wal-Mart. And yes, I do have a life and no I’m not weird… Although I was telling this plan to everyone I spoke with on the phone today, and they’ve decided I am weird… and that I talk too fast. (Sorry baby.)

This plan turned out to be harder than I expected. Sales, different sizes and weights of products, etc., make it difficult to do a side-by-side comparison. So, with seven items, I deduced that going to Target actually saved me 49 cents—and a hell of a lot of grief: no screaming kids, mad salespersons or grumpy women fellow shoppers. Matter of fact, I ran into one woman’s cart twice (Shut. Up.) and she just kept laughing. We ended up having a lovely chat about 2-ply, lol.

It’s still a tough call, though. Looking at several Wal-Mart receipts, I noticed that prices fluctuated quite a bit when things were on sale—over a dollar for Diet Coke, bottled water, toilet paper and cat food. In the end, I probably have saved more by shopping at Wal-Mart.

However, Target has sales, too. (12 packs of Coke products are on sale, 3 for $10 right now.) And a lot of times the prices at Wal-Mart are comparable to those at Target—it’s the sale prices that make each store come out about equal… when it comes to price, that is.

I really don’t like going to Wal-Mart. It makes me irritable, and I’m really not that fun when I’m irritable (again, sorry baby). So I think I’ll go back to shopping at Target—and watch for the sale prices. Which, seriously, is where real money is saved.

On a completely separate note, I got hit on by a very adorable man at Bed, Bath and Beyond. I bought a teakettle (I would’ve directed you to BBandB, but they didn’t have this one online)—I’ve wanted one for awhile and I’m all excited about it. Possibly more than I need to be, but ah well. Of course, I didn’t have to pay anything for it because I returned a coffee pot and had a 20% off coupon and it came out even. Anyway, said adorable man at BBandB? Liked the spelling of my name (it’s different than normal) and then when I laughed and just started talking to him, he blushed. Furiously blushed—red as a tomato. And stammered. And then asked me if I needed help out to my car. At that point I almost blushed (and said sure why not)—what, it was cute—but it was a little teakettle and I didn’t even need a bag. lol

Saturdays are entertaining, aren’t they?

It’s like the song that doesn’t end. About llamas.

And it’s funny, and no, I don’t know why.

Snatched it from her. (She’s funny, too.)

Guess who got a HEMI?

Hi Dad. Did you get a Hemi?

You should sound more excited than that. It’s a HEMI.

Woohoo. Which one did you end up getting?

The Overland. Your mom wouldn’t let me have the Commander. ::giant sigh::

Dad, you’re never going to need that many seats. Ever.

I might. You never know when you need extra space.

I hear my mom in the background…. grandchildren is mentioned… my dad laughs.

Epilogue: My dad got himself the new Grand Jeep Cherokee Overland, with a HEMI.

(Make sure you say it with oomph.)

🙂