A couple of weeks ago the Chop had gone home for his sister’s wedding, so my parents came out to help me while he was gone. I can’t tell you how necessary that was. Trying to juggle working and a baby is slowly frying my brain. We’re exhausted all the time and work is getting done at about 1/2 the pace it was, which for some clients means I get really annoying emails every day asking if something is ready.

The Chop says I have spoiled them for years, turning work around at a very fast pace (ie, same day) and now they’re squawking about my taking a week to build a site (seriously, come on — a week is too long? bite me).

Before my mom left the Chop and I had our first outing sans baby… for sushi and a Sufjan concert. The sushi was magical and Sufjan was quite good too, but I think I would’ve appreciated it more had I not wanted to curl up and sleep, lol. People tell you about not sleeping, but until you’ve been severely sleep deprived (now for six weeks straight), you really can’t comprehend it.

The Peanut is starting to sleep for longer(ish) stretches — 3.5 hours, woot! — but I would kill for 6-7 hours of straight sleep. He’s had a bad bout of gas the past couple of days (omFg), but I think we’ve moved past those screaming fits (poor kid, you feel bad for him, but you also want to tell him to quiet down, lol). The books say he should spontaneously start sleeping through the night soon. I await that day with great anticipation.

He’s smiling now, though, so that pretty much makes up for everything. 🙂

Today I turned 28. Last year on my birthday I knew I’d spend this one married… I didn’t know I’d spend it holding a baby. Who, incidentally, is having a growth spurt today and wants to eat constantly and hardly sleep. Fortunately he smells yummy and is generally adorable, so I don’t mind that my birthday was spent changing diapers, washing bottles and eating takeout while holding a fussbucket. 🙂

In a couple of days the Chop is heading to MN for his sister’s wedding, and while my mom is coming to help while he’s gone (thank god, he’s still only sleeping for two-three hour stretches at night), I’m still not looking forward to it.

The Chop, of course, is excited to get hours and hours of uninterrupted sleep… and so I also hate him just a little bit, lol.

28. I’m really on the downside towards 30 now, sigh.

We finally got the call this afternoon… can you be at the hospital in an hour? I said yes (obviously I’m nuts), and then we packed up, dropped off the dog, grabbed lunch and were there in two. Hi, yes, we are all late in this family!

I’ve been at the hospital now for about three and a half hours. I’m on a pitocin drip (to induce labor), and while I’m having contractions, they aren’t super strong and the doctor thinks this will take all night. Party.

They keep asking me my pain level — on a scale of 0-10—and apparently 20 is when they give an epidural. Ha ha. My nurse is a joker.

Today is my due date, and no, before you ask, the baby is not currently outside of my womb. In fact, I’m actually quite normal—the average is 10 days past your damn due date for first time mothers.

That, however, does not stop every. single. person. from asking me every. single. day. if I’ve had the baby. I shit you not. I have saved the emails and text messages and now I am refusing to answer the goddamn phone. I honestly thought nothing could get worse than being still pregnant, but OH NO, found it!

The real issue is the people who are clients. Quite frankly, I know their concern is will their work get done. Sure, sure, they care a little about the actual baby and all that, but the reality is: will I leave them in the lurch?! Even after I’ve assured everyone everything will still get done, they’ve decided, in their crazy little brains, it won’t. EVEN THOUGH LAST YEAR I GOT MARRIED AND EVERYTHING STILL GOT DONE.

I was supposed to be at the hospital an hour and a half ago to be induced (he’s big and long and blah blah, I don’t want to go over and be forced into a C section) — they called at 5AM to say they were pushing me back a few hours.

“We had lots of women go into labor last night.”
Oh that’s nice for them. *bitches*
*laughter* “Oh I’m sure we’ll see you soon! We’ll call around 730.”

Frankly I slept like shit, so at 730 I was just staring at the clock. I got up to shower, the phone rang… more active labor people and suddenly my inducement is bumped to tomorrow. Sigh.

I’m trying to look at this as a positive. October baby, yay! Another day of being stressed, boo. Friday birth, way better than Thursday work-wise, yay. Another night of barely sleeping, possibly getting up at 5 to hear I’m not going in again, boo.

Awesome, yes? Pregnancy. Woot.

It’s been over nine months and I’ve finally managed to legally change my name. I hyphenated, but of course, and yet it’s taken me ages to a) get the marriage license, b) get to the social security office, c) get to the DMV and d) get to the bank. I actually think men instituted this bullshit system because of the shit we put them through during wedding planning, lol. Surprisingly the DMV was a piece of cake—I actually hadn’t finished filling out the paperwork before they called my number. The bank, on the other hand, took two very long, very irritating hours. Who knew changing your name and putting someone else on your account was so much work?

For even more fun, when I went to the post office to drop off a package, the woman behind the desk asked if I was having twins. I chuckled and said, uh no. And she said, oh my! Well you’re just all belly! And it’s huge! And then she must’ve realized she sounded rude, because she apologized… while calling someone from the back to come see my giant stomach. Kill me now. I totally get why women used to go into “hiding” during the last few weeks of their pregnancy. I realize, yes, I am really sticking out—I am 39 weeks pregnant today after all—but seriously, rude much?

They said it best on Let’s Panic About Babies!

Here’s the thing: the last month of pregnancy sucks balls and there’s nothing you can do about it but have a good cry. There, there, this will all be over soon. Here, I think I have an Altoid in my purse.

My god, you’re huge.

I realize it’s bad to hope you go into labor early, but by early, I don’t mean really early, I mean 37 weeks. Or 36. Or 35. Sadly, my baby is a bum and has decided he wants to stick around inside for awhile longer.

This marks the second week of visiting the OBGYN, having her stick her hand up there (and feel his head) and say, “Nope, hasn’t dropped, your cervix is closed.” Aside from being uncomfortable (she can feel his head), it’s quite depressing every time. I’m beyond ready to have the inside of my body back — and to sleep, even if it’s fits and spurts, comfortably.

The Chop is requiring I post the following:

My husband thinks I’m lame because I didn’t post this the minute after I watched it:

Yesterday marked 35 weeks of pregnancy for me — 35 long, slow, hot weeks, lol. I had an ultrasound on Monday and he is now 6lbs 7oz (+/- 17 oz, so who the hell knows) and today at my other appointment I measured 2 full weeks bigger. Kill me now.

My parents have been here the past couple of days, and my basement? Still not done. Although I am heading downstairs now to see exactly how much more time will be needed. We are at 20 days (including two Saturdays) and I am more than ready for the process to be over.

Sadly they spotted a leak that’s coming from a small crack in a tile in my upstairs bathroom… which means I will now have to have them come back to look into the wall and see if I have mold and to fix the crack. The baby and I are very highly annoyed.

My dad is going to a rally in DC tomorrow — he’s so excited it’s kinda sad. Initially my mom said it was rude coming here, then going down there, but we’ve decided he’s too much of a handful, so sure, take a bus down 8 hours, go to a Glenn Beck rally with Sarah Palin (I know, I know, our politics are soooo polar opposite) and then take a bus back 8 hours. Have fun! We’ll be here chilling. Heading to dinner. Eating ice cream. Definitely not riding on a bus for 8 hours with a bunch of gun-toting crazy people 😛

I realize everyone says kids are expensive, but seriously, until you are preparing to bring a baby into this world, you really don’t realize the extent of that expense. As in strollers that cost hundreds of dollars, plus a car seat, then a bassinet… oh but also a crib, other nursery furniture, special nail clippers, soap, diapers, diaper wipes, sheets, bumpers (for the crib), baby monitor, clothes, booties, hats, and yes, the list goes on. Now just imagine that after you’ve had the baby for oh, 7-10 months, you have to buy most of this stuff all over again! Apparently peanut grows out of things quickly, lol.

Peanut, sadly, is still unnamed. We’ve fortunately knocked one of the list permanently, but that still keeps us at three. Sigh. Person naming is very disconcerting.

The Chop and I explored our basement yesterday (sadly, laundry is the gift that keeps on giving), and so far it’s coming along. They jackhammered the rest of the laundry room/bathroom tile out, which is good, but managed to leave little tiny pieces of tile embedded in the ceiling, which is not good. The Chop assures me they will clean that off (along with the inch of dust)—but he figures if they don’t, we know my mom will when she comes to visit in three weeks lol.

Today I had a meeting that lasted from 915AM to 415PM. Seven hours in one room with two, sometimes three people, where we attempted to compile accurate lists of their products on their website. It was excruciating.

The worst part was that we were in a closed room—meaning the temperature did not come down from around 79 all day. And we sat virtually the entire time. So not only was I boiling, but the baby crawled his way up to my ribs and decided to stay there kicking for seven hours.

Tomorrow the final step in the basement process begins and oy, I am not looking forward to having “company” every day for two weeks. Especially considering the 90 degree temps they are forecasting. I cleaned Sunday, then did a little bit of weeding and spent all of Monday in pain—hello back and abdominal muscles. Do I need to use you all to clean? Apparently, yes.