December 10th, 2006sushi and cupcakes and pulverized porkchops
Nine purses, two wallets, two pairs of sunglasses and one completely dead Porkchop… that is what I accomplished this morning on Canal Street.
We walked the 40 or so blocks down, but cabbed back. Which was necessary, but kinda sad since the cab drove by a restaurant called “Burgers and Cupcakes,” and it had a giant, pink-frosted cupcake on the awning.
Fortunately for the no-longer-fully-functioning-Porkchop, it wasn’t “Sushi and Cupcakes,” so I didn’t make the cabbie stop.
Fortunate also for me, since he might’ve disowned me at that point, lol.
porkchops and brits aren’t allowed to disown us. we’re too awesome and cute.
Comment by wendykat — December 11, 2006 @ 1:17 pm
See, and I would think the same thing, but lol.. it was pretty funny.
Comment by the insider — December 11, 2006 @ 1:25 pm
Ok – here’s the Porkchop’s version of things (i.e., the truth):
1) On the way to Canal Street the Insider walked into a building. Not “let’s open a door and enter,” but “whoa, that building just jumped in front of me!” That was the highlight of the afternoon.
2) Once we got there, I was quickly introduced to the rules. “I might say ‘I really want a Coach bag’ to you, but I’m not actually saying it to you – I’m saying it to them.” “If I ask you what your opinion is, always say no. If I ask for your honest opinion you can tell me what you actually think.” I felt like I was suddenly a part of some elaborate confidence scheme – little did I know that the joke was to be on me.
3) Suddenly, the world was awash with sound and vision – yelling, scurrying, suitcases opening and closing, bootleg dvds being displayed and disappearing just as quickly. We enter a shop lined with purses called Smoach and Smada, and the Insider looks for a person who’s waiting to receive a nod and wink. Eventually, she finds a recipient (and later, again, and again, ad nauseum). We wander from the hustling masses to side streets, winding stairs, locked doors. Everything smells like moldy leather and stale cheese. We find purses called Coach and Prada, which strangely look exactly like Smoach and Smada. Money changes hands (after no small amount of haggling) and I’m given a large plastic bag full of contraband.
4) Like I said, this happened several times. Here’s my problem with the whole thing – these are f-ing purses. Not even real f-ing purses, but fake ones. And I’m wandering around carrying a treasure trove of fake purses that look like real purses, and apparently they’re all from last season. I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS! When will a simple Porkchop be allowed to simply be? Not be a transporter of illegal goods, but be a Porkchop – bereft of concerns over handbags and the studded wallets that come with them?
Comment by The Porkchop — December 11, 2006 @ 1:41 pm
1) I DIDN’T SEE IT!
2) hehehe… I was preparing him. It was very necessary, lol.
3) rotfl lmao lol.
4) Some are last season, some aren’t, but they are all GORGEOUS and very well-made, which is very important! And I had to make sure to check several places to be certain I got the best ones.
He doesn’t understand… such a guy. 😛
Comment by the insider — December 11, 2006 @ 2:01 pm
I tried to explain the whole fake bag thing to the boyfriend once. His response was basically the same. ‘It’s just a purse’. It is NOT!!
Comment by Jen — December 11, 2006 @ 2:49 pm
uhm. i think i’m gonna get kicked out of the girly club with this comment but…
it’s just a purse! it’s just a fake purse!
*hangs head in shame* sorry girls.
Comment by wendykat — December 11, 2006 @ 4:56 pm
Buuuuuut…To the legions of women out there who see you with it, and don’t know it’s a fake, it’s not just a purse. It may be the purse they want, or they see you as a member of some exclusive ‘I-can-afford- to-buy-a-$300-purse’ club. Or something like that.
*smiles hopefully*
Comment by Jen — December 11, 2006 @ 5:34 pm
Better you than me, bro, better you than me.
Comment by Grampa — December 11, 2006 @ 11:15 pm
I can’t stop laughing at what Porkchop wrote!! Can’t wait till you guys get here; I think Porkchop will fit in just fine. 🙂
Comment by The Sister — December 12, 2006 @ 12:23 am
wow, such a good shopping u had!
Comment by Me, Myself and I — December 12, 2006 @ 11:52 am
Jen.. 🙂 It’s just really darn cute. And boys don’t get it.
And apparently, WENDY doesn’t get it either… SO DISOWNED GIRLIE!
Grampa.. 😛 Whatever. It’s fun. You’d probably enjoy the haggling, so nyah.
Sis.. hehehe, I know he will. Told you!
Me.. LOL. Yes, we did. 🙂
Comment by the insider — December 12, 2006 @ 12:19 pm
ok, so the porkchop doesn’t understand the shopping but bravo on such a success! and also , bravo on a porkchop that will trudge through all of that! way to go man!
Comment by connie — December 12, 2006 @ 7:22 pm
lol.. never again, apparently. 🙂
Comment by the insider — December 14, 2006 @ 10:38 am