September 28th, 2006

in limbo

When my sister and I were younger, and lived at home, we shared a bathroom. It wasn’t the only bathroom in the house, but it was the one where we kept our cosmetics and showered, etc., and it had the distinction of being the only room that was “ours” which locked.

Until my sister figured out how to pick the lock with a hair pin.

From that day on, whenever one of us wanted to be in the bathroom alone, we opened the three drawers closest to the door, successfully forming a barrier. So, while the door was able to open an inch or so, the intruder could only stick a couple of fingers in and bitch about being unable to grab a brush or go to the bathroom.

Having now lived alone for over three years, I am very used to going to the bathroom and taking a shower with the door wide open… but now that there’s someone else here, I subconsciously feel the need to shut the door. Fortunately, I’m happy to say I don’t feel the need to lock it or open a drawer to block someone’s unlawful entry. (Thanks sis, for making me PARANOID.)

I got offered the job that’s 120 miles away. Not only did they offer the job, they offered to rent me an apartment so that I could live up there five days a week, and come home on weekends.

I can’t tell you how gratifying that is, knowing someone thinks I’m so good that they’ll rent me an apartment, just so that I’ll work for them. I’ve spent the past couple of months interviewing for jobs and wondering if I’m ever going to find something that’ll be good for me and good for my employer—so hearing that someone thinks I’m good enough is a relief.

I turned it down.

Porkchop moved here so that we could make a go at this, and while the job is tempting, I wouldn’t want to be there five days a week, and here two. I don’t want to have to drive four hours each day either, leaving before dawn and getting home just in time for primetime. (Which, in and of itself, is good, since I have a complete addiction to about eight different TV shows. I know, I know, I need help. Whatever. :P)

We talked about moving halfway, but that would put us in the middle of several very expensive areas and is just not feasible at this point in time.

Still, I’m a little bit sad—but also hopeful and less worried about finding something. Everyone keeps telling me to relax, that I just need to wait for the job I really want.

Problem is, I don’t know what I really want.