October 12th, 2005can I get a red eye please…
Shot in the dark?
Hammerhead?
All-nighter?
Black Eye?
Coffee Suicide?
Cup o’ Crack?
Dead Man Walking?
Overdrive?
I prefer the term “red eye.” It’s a shot of espresso in a cup of regular drip coffee and it’s quite tasty.
This morning I stopped at my favorite local coffee shop. I have a cold weather drink and a hot weather drink. In the summer I’m a double iced espresso over ice, extra ice. In the winter, I’m a red eye.
It was cold this morning (still is), so I ordered a red eye. Two girls I didn’t recognize were working—and one was obviously new to the business. Holding the cup, she said, “OK, what’s that?”
“Oh,” I said. “Do you call it a ‘Shot in the Dark?’ It’s just a shot of espresso in a cup of drip coffee.”
The other girl looked at me and said, “It’s not on our menu.”
I looked up. It wasn’t. I smiled… “Um… OK.” I’m sure I looked confused.
“We have it,” she explained. “We just call it add a shot of espresso to your cup of coffee.”
“Long name… that must be why it’s not on your menu, huh?” I grinned. (Their menu is a small chalkboard.)
Less than amused, she said, “Well we’re not that fancy.” And walked away.
WTF did I say?!
And first of all, before any crazy coffee people jump on me, let me say: I’m from Seattle. I worked in coffee for almost seven years. I overtip and I know what I’m talking about. And I wasn’t being rude. 😛
Lovely people in the AM, hmm?
perhaps they needed a red eye as well. or at least a nice smack upside the head for talking back to paying customers.
Comment by wendykat — October 12, 2005 @ 11:26 am
Thats why, any coffee that I drink i get right at the super america down the street. 🙂 plus its only 89 cents.
Comment by andy — October 12, 2005 @ 11:38 am
Probably needed a red eye. Or at least a nice smack… er, no, wendykat already said that.
Maybe they were new to the business, and felt a little self-conscious not knowing, and attack being the best defence and all that… Next time, try enunciating “add a shot of espresso to my cup of coffee, pleaaaase”, and see how it goes. Maybe they love a little hard-talk in the morning. Maybe politeness is not their thing. I could go on like this forever, can you tell? 😉
Comment by anne — October 12, 2005 @ 11:38 am
Wendy… probably. I like the smack idea best, though.
Andy—that’s not coffee my friend. That’s jet fuel. Ick. 😛
Anne: So that’s how the French do it, hmm? 😉 lol
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 11:47 am
I get McDonald’s Coffee, the kind in the fancy McDonald cup.
Comment by Augustus — October 12, 2005 @ 12:01 pm
I’m a bourgeoisie, I can’t help it. I just enjoy the finer aspects of life.
Dammit, I’m a proletariat, and it sucks.
Comment by Augustus — October 12, 2005 @ 12:03 pm
Seriously… McDonald’s? Why, Augie, why?
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 12:06 pm
the great thing about having mcdonalds/super america coffee is that its cheap and if you havent tried anything better (me not being a big coffee drinker) then you dont know that its bad!
Comment by andy — October 12, 2005 @ 12:09 pm
See, no, no, no… that’s just so very wrong.
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 12:16 pm
Oh dear, flash with your trash and now too fancy for the coffee shop! You, m’dear, are just too classy for your environs!
I think you may be too classy for me, I quite enjoy a McDo’s coffee!
Comment by ms. mac — October 12, 2005 @ 12:43 pm
LOL… no I’m not. 😛
I’m just from Seattle. Regular coffee to me is Starbucks.
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 12:49 pm
Starbucks. Thats an omnious name. bucks…stars…star…bucks….They make you feel like a star while stealing your bucks, thus starbucks. Hahaha, I figured you out, you evil corporation.
Comment by Augustus — October 12, 2005 @ 12:53 pm
Noooo! I’m very sweet, and smiling, and polite, and… I was just saying that maybe that was what they were expecting, so maybe the fact that you were nice threw them. :p
Comment by anne — October 12, 2005 @ 1:00 pm
Augie: 😛 OK, maybe a little…
Anne… lol. 😉 I know you are… but that’s a good point. Maybe they were expecting attitude.
I’ll give that a try. 🙂
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 1:06 pm
Coffee snob.
Comment by Grampa — October 12, 2005 @ 1:54 pm
hate starbucks. with a passion. and i love coffee. but i hate starbucks. i prefer small coffee shops where they are the only one of their type in existance. or i brew my own jet fuel at home… mmmmm so strong you can stand a spoon in it, well, until the coffee eats the spoon anyway.
Comment by wendykat — October 12, 2005 @ 2:02 pm
Now that’s a girl after my own heart.
I, too, strongly dislike the starbucks and prefer indies when I have to go to them.
However, I can buy excellent coffee by the pound for less than the price of six cups at a coffee shop, so fuck that shit. They don’t make it strong enough anyway. Amen to the spoon standing.
Comment by Grampa — October 12, 2005 @ 2:12 pm
Grampa—you’re a snob too. And quit hitting on wendy, she’s taken. 😛
Wendy: Ah, see, but Starbucks is my home brand you see. I must support it. On the other hand, I do prefer the smaller ones. I only worked for one chain, Tully’s, and the others were small indies. The place I went to tihs morning… tiny.
Oh, and have you tried a stovetop espresso maker? Oh my god… the best espresso you’ve ever had. 🙂
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 2:18 pm
Yeah. whatevah.
Comment by Grampa — October 12, 2005 @ 2:22 pm
Fine, I’ll see if I can set that up for you. 😛
Now where’s the Englishman today… :::off to look:::
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 2:26 pm
hahaha funny!!!
Comment by me, myself and I — October 12, 2005 @ 3:02 pm
WHAT!? i don’t want no stinkin’ grampa.. back away from the englishman insider… or i’ll, i’ll… i’ll make some weak coffee and call it starbucks…
Comment by wendykat — October 12, 2005 @ 3:13 pm
ROTFL….
Woah wendy darling… I meant I’d go get him and make him come fight Grampa. ROTFL
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 3:18 pm
I’ll have you know I’m scrappy.
Comment by Grampa — October 12, 2005 @ 3:38 pm
I think there should be mud.
That is all.
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 3:43 pm
Jello.
Comment by Grampa — October 12, 2005 @ 4:36 pm
Grape or Strawberry?
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 4:45 pm
I’m sayin’ both.
Girls, do you have any preference?
Comment by Grampa — October 12, 2005 @ 5:12 pm
I’d say strawberry.
But nothing is getting on me… let’s make that perfectly clear.
This is between you and the boy.
I’m just the facilitator. 🙂
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 5:18 pm
mmmmm jello covered boys…
Comment by wendykat — October 12, 2005 @ 5:40 pm
god i hope he decided not to read this one…
Comment by wendykat — October 12, 2005 @ 5:41 pm
Geez I was hoping the opposite… lol 😛
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 5:47 pm
you would. brat.
Comment by wendykat — October 12, 2005 @ 7:10 pm
Hehe.. 🙂
Comment by the insider — October 12, 2005 @ 7:53 pm
I’m here, too….SOMEONE TALK TO ME!
Comment by Augustus — October 13, 2005 @ 12:49 am
Dude, it’s late. BED TIME. 😛
Go to sleep.
Comment by the insider — October 13, 2005 @ 1:07 am
What the hell are you doing up so late?
Comment by grampa — October 13, 2005 @ 2:56 am
I work 2nd shift and suffer insomnia.
Comment by Augustus — October 13, 2005 @ 3:20 am
Insider is guarding her trashcan 24/7 from the computer which has CCTV monitors fixated on the trashcan while she sips $90 coffee.
Is that right, insider?
Comment by Augustus — October 13, 2005 @ 3:22 am
The insider was having trouble sleeping.
Not guarding her trashcan, lol.
Comment by the insider — October 13, 2005 @ 8:45 am
well… you got your wish there insider…per the email i just got…
“I definitely missed out. I will have to go take out my frustration by wrestling some yank in a pool of strawberry jelly :o) ”
sigh. at least he’s got a FABULOUS sense of humor or is that humour?
Comment by wendykat — October 13, 2005 @ 10:35 am
ROTFL… hehehe. He’s adorable. 🙂
Comment by the insider — October 13, 2005 @ 10:39 am
yea. i know. it makes me sick really.
Comment by wendykat — October 13, 2005 @ 10:52 am
LOL… you love it. 😛
Comment by the insider — October 13, 2005 @ 10:57 am